«*TATB NOR MA- LITE '////m nnw \\\\\\\\v^// ///// // / ; 1 1 1 n\\\ \v^ 19 2 5 HOLIDAY EDITION z 5 PQ _: c X u < oc C z SEASON'S GREETINGS Within the hall are song and laughter, The cheeks of Christmas glow red and jolly, e And sprouting on every corhel and rafter The lightsome green of ivy and holly. lames? ftustfell lotoell STATE NORMA-LITE ->y///////ii\\\\\\\\xx^^^x/////////iin\\\\v^ VOL. 2 JANUARY, 1925 NO. 1 NORMA-LITE STAFF Editor in Chief Associate Editor Associate Editor M. A. A. Reporter W. A. A. Reporter Humor Editor Art Editors Business Manager Faculty Advisers Carroll E. Davenport Jos.eph Riordan John Fitzpatrick Edward Stebbins Mary Wilcox Francis Hurlburt \ Fred Gentsch } Mabel Vanslette George Draper I Susan M. Williams Henry J. Clancy I Frank S. Livermore Printers Eugene Caldwell Thomas Bowler Ferdinand Toupence Raymond Pelletier Fred H. Gentsch Merle G. Hall Raymond Ingham Contributors Mr. Parkinson Mr. Harrington C. E. Davenport Gerd Aage Gillhoff Vera Goodrich Mary E. Williams Betty Saltzman Grace M. Can- Gertrude I. McConville Doris M. Chase Bernadette Mahoney Mr. Kirkpa trick Thomas Bowler John McNally Alice V. Cashman Mary Carmody Kitty Wilcox Mary Marsh Lillian Brewster Claire Fisher Katherine Boyle Mildred Marble THE EDITOR'S SUPPLICATION By C. E. Davenport If to your mind does spring A bit o'humor, anything Clever, witty, or bright, Put it in the Norma-lite. Write some little story On valor, love, or glory Of fair maid and bold knight; Put it in the Norma-lite. Mayhap 'tis a poem sad, But it will make me glad; If you but do the right, Put it in the Norma-lite. Those who aspire to teach, 'Tis you that I beseech To do your bit. Write! Write! ! Put it in the Norma-lite. HOW TO STUDY INTELLIGENTLY By Mr. Kirkpatrick I "Use the intelligence you's bo'n with", is a brief and true answer. The first essential is to keep your brain, which is the chief physiological mechanism used in studying, in first class condition. To keep it in good working order the whole body must be in perfect health and the blood flowing to it, pure and well supplied with oxygen. The brain should be called upon to do only one piece of work at a time and should be con- centrated vigorously and exclusively upon that. It must not be required to work after fatigue has set in, and after doing one piece of work it should be allowed a short interval of free activity before being set at an- other task. If it becomes sluggish STATE NORMA-LITE after working awhile, a little vigorous physical exercise will often enliven it, because waste products are cleared out of the brain by the freer cir- culation. II Proper light, temperature and pos- ture are helpful, as is also some degree of quietness; but the latter is not necessary if you can ignore all noises as of no significance to you. You should be alone or among those who, whether quiet or not, never demand your attention. If it is nec- essary to give attention to some- thing other than the task in hand, do so completely, then turn again quickly to your task. Do not try to work while giving half your attention to something else. Ill In preparing a lesson get full ben- efit of your former knowledge and experience by first noting the topic and thinking of what you already know about it. As you read, look for the more important facts or questions being discussed, and con- nect these with any knowledge that you already have about them. You will be helped in this by making an outline of what you study and by stating in your own words the chief facts or truths belonging with each topic. Try to group and arrange the material so that minor points may be included under larger headings. Think how the truths could be il- lustrated from your own knowledge and supplemented by further obser- vation or reading. Go over the lesson a second time, noting how one topic is related to the others and what would be the effect of rearrang- ing their order. To make sure that you will recall the truths when needed, connect them with names, questions or situations in which they are likely to occur when you need them. Review lessons briefly the next day after studying them and review this lessson along with others, after some weeks or months. IV At all times be alert to connect lessons in various subjects with each other and with your reading, the conversation you hear and with your observations. Seek to use what you have learned in conversing with others, in writing papers and in practical affairs. V If you will think just how many of these suggestions you success- fully conformed to. in studying the last lesson before reading this, or in the first one afterwards, you will find out how useful they are and how easy or difficult it is to carry them out and you will be carrying out one of them. Which one? If you give names to each of these paragraphs and count the number of points under each, what suggestion will you be carrying out? Bill Daley claims he is the original hard-luck guy. It seems that Bill took two days off to vote and then he completely forgot to put his name on the ballot. At least, that is what he says. Editorials SCHOOL SPIPJT By Mary Carmody With the reopening of school we have among us many new, eager students who, by their loyalty and school spirit will not only continue but strengthen the reputation held by Fitchburg Normal in the past. First, school spirit is loyalty to our school. And loyalty, besides being a patriotic emotion of fidelity, ad- miration, and respect for our country, state or school is really a duty. It is a duty because it is a vital element in every school, for if a person does not possess this devotion, or loyalty to the school of which he is a pupil, he is not a vital part of the school. Now school spirit is not only a duty, it is also an emotion which many doubt whether or not they possess. The surest proof then of whether we possess it or not is by practical demonstration; namely, in- terest in our school's scholastic and athletic activities. We must keep our scholastic athletic activities up to the standard, never letting them for one minute fall below. We must show our interest in athletics by taking an interest in the various teams. Be a member of some team if you can, or at least show your school spirit by attending the games and cheering your teams to victory. There is so much to be said in favor of vocal support. Let us look back to the recent foot-ball games, bleachers lined with young men and women, eyes glued on the swaying, grappling, dust-covered figures on that field. W T hat was the part of those spectators? To support their team with their enthusiastic voices. As the old Greek philosopher said, "A man knows not himself," but will be exerted to greater efforts if he can hear the applause and encouragement of his schoolmates and knows that he is not fighting alone for his school, but is supported at least by the student body. So it is hoped that the new mem- bers of our school will heed our STATE NORMA-LITE words, and by showing their school spirit give to their school the aid that it needs. For it is in you, the Juniors, that we place our hope and trust, for you are the builders of Fitchburg Normal's future. THE NECESSITY OF BEING AMUSED By Mary E. Williams The man without a sense of humor is as unfortunate as "The Man With- out a Country." Perhaps he has reached his success at the top of the ladder; perhaps the desire of his life has been fulfilled; perhaps he is at peace with the world. But he has my heartfelt sympathies, for without a sense of humor he has nothing. It is indeed one of the most val- uable assets in our lives. What about our deep sorrows and disappoint- ments when we feel we cannot bear up under the stress of our hardships? It is that little grain of fun which rescues us from floundering in the deep sea of despair. And it is not so often the big troubles but the little trials and trib- ulations that come to us in our every day life. Suppose we could see nothing amusing in the grotesque tumble we took at the very feet of the new superintendent, upon whom we wanted to make such a good im- pression, too. That mortifying incident might remain with us for weeks or even months were it not for the fact that we could laugh at the very absurdity of it. Is it not amusingly odd that the very morning we get up late our shoe lacings are sure to break, there is a long dropstitch in our best black stocking, our clothes persist in going on the wrong side out and our fav- orite scarf pin is nowhere to be found? It is too true that our sense of humor may often limes prove ex- ceedingly embarrassing. It is indeed distressing when in the most solemn part of the sermon we feel that persistent desire to giggle at the fly which is tickling the minister's nose. Or at the very climax of the noted lecturer's discourse, someone sneezes violently. Laughing up our sleeve certainly isn't much of a compen- sation. But even so there is no better life saver than the sense of humor. May we all abide by this motto: Laugh and the world laughs with you, Kick and you kick alone, For the cheerful grin will let you in, Where the kicker is never known. THE QUEEN OF THE SKY By Lillian Brewster The queen of the sky is riding high, Come, throw her a kiss as she goes by, Then sleep, my baby, and dream, my lad, Dreams that are tender, and youthful and glad. And the queen afar in her silver car, Sends a message down by a glittering star, The wee, bright thing slips through the dark skies And stops to rest in my darling's eyes. It leaves its message and speeds through the night — My little one smiles and his face is bright As he lifts his head and whispers this, "The queen sends thanks for her good- night kiss." STATE NORMA-LITE ON ORIGINALITY By Mr. Harrington How urgently we dash around after the '-latest", whether it be song. dance or breakfast-food; a way to carve our hair or dye our shirts. How restlessly we rush from the place where we are, to the place where t. e have never been — to the uttermost parts of the earth, if we have money enough. But we find the song never late enough, the place never far enough, the style never new enough, to give the happiness we crave. Some of us then fold our features into a world-weary look, and announce that, though still young, we have done all, been all, seen all, and, having found it all "old stuff", must decline to give attention to any thought, emotion, or so-called phe- nomenon which may arise from then on. Some of us continue to dash from one new thriller to another, and are never etill long enough to find that we are unhappy until we are too tired to flutter longer. All of this comes from the assumption that if we could find something complete- ly original, new, to do or think or see, we could really attain to happi- ness ; and the trouble is that of course there is nothing new to find, either in the little or the great things. The new wrinkles in Mah-Jongg are some four centuries old ; Joan of Arc bobbed he*- hair ; Joseph wore a coat of many colors ; Columbus found a new world — filled with a race of men as ancient as his own; we lister: over the radio — and hear no new voice or music. Trees and mountains, sunrise and sunset, stars and moonlight, the roar of the sea, and the sighing of the wind, are what they have been. Life and love and death, and all their combinations, ire old as the hills and the seas. Originality, in this sense, can only belong to the Creator. For human beings, the only origi- nality that can be discovered is that within themselves. Homer and Shakespere, whom the race has agreed to credit with the supreme degree of human originality, did not even pretend to be writing anything new. The one retold the legends of his people, already handed down for many generations; the other borrow- ed tales from any collection that came his way. Simply this: where others had seen but the same old tales, they, seeing for themselves, saw living men and women, and, in their retelling, lend us their senses and sympathies that we may see flesh and blood and throbbing hearts where had walked but puppets and names. As with them, so with us, the originality, and consequently the happiness, lies not in the newness of the thing seen, but in the newness of the seer. The things that are worth while are old; man, because he is man, has owned them for ages; but for each of us the making them our own is an original creative act. If we can bend our strength, not to chasing novelties, but to creating within the old eternal things, life will remain fresh, each day a time of STATE NORMA-LITE eager adventure. In teaching, we cover the same content year after year, but each new child's acqui- sition of it offers us a new and exciting drama. And, finally, however small our own creative ability, yet we have given to us, because we are human, to create with the aid of the masters in pictures and books and music, who could sense clearly what we can grasp but dimly; but whose record of what they sensed we can make our own. Can you imagine Homer, old and helpless and blind, finding life turned stale? He, who could build within himself a very world of living men? STUDENT GOVERNMENT By Mary Carmody Student Government, a toast to you! Like a sturdy little ship that starts out on a stormy sea and weath- ers the tempests day after day, until finally the sea becomes calm and the ship proceeds triumphantly, so are you, cautiously and hopefully steer- ing through the sea of trials, and, backed by strong winds of co-oper- ation, you sail on nearer and nearer the harbor of complete success. We have watched you grow, and our pride in you and co-operation with you will never cease. Each one of us forms a binding link in that great chain of mutual interest that once broken, is broken forever, but which with us, students of Fitchburg Normal School, will stay firm as the "Rock of Ages." STAR DUST By Mary Marsh There was a time when hope gleamed high Like a blue white star in a winter sky. And up a rough and rugged steep A traveler trudged, the world below asleep. The winter passed, And spring stole by, And still the star hung in the sky. The summer came so soft and still — And the star hung over the distant hill. Then, like a chariot of the night It fell, and left a trail of light. The traveler, weary with many a mile Looked up, and saw it fall And smiled ATUMN FIRES By Doris M. Chase I love to build a fire at night, And watch the smoke a-curling, To see the strange ethereal light, Towards heavens stars unfurling. In the flames, down near the embers Is the birth of a dream come true, Higher it rises and higher Till in its spell I cannot move. Then like a dream it fades and dies, The orange to grey is blended, Until it reaches the peaks of the stars, And I know that my dream is ended. * * * * Someone has suggested that the following signs be placed on the Fords of Mr. Harrington and Mr. Hubbard: "The tin you love to touch." Let no man put asunder. There is beauty in every jar. Let the rest of the world go by. Why buy baby a rattle? Don't call me Lizzie. Sound value, Don't you hear it? STATE NORMA-LITE CHRISTMAS A MILESTONE By Mr. Parkinson Ever since man began to measure time at all it has been his custom to set apart certain days on which to remind himself of some great event of the past and to relay to posterity the lessons he derives from that event. Christmas is the day of all days observed the world around, more widely over the earth's surface, if not by more of its people, than any other day of the year. It is celebra- ted as the birthday of The Child Of The Manger, although nobody knows that it is the correct date. New Year's Day is also assumed to be the anniversary of the birth of Jesus, from which our years purport to be numbered. Both days derive their significance from the same great event, although both dates are un- certain and even the years are prob- ably numbered wrong. But fortun- ately the real significance of a day or season does not rest upon the precision of an ancient or a modern calendar. The Christmas season has been accepted as marking the advent of Joy To The World. It is the season for the spread of Good Will Among Men. Christmas is The Day Of The Child and those who would, "become as little child- ren," and so qualify for a part in that Kingdom for whose coming Christians are taught to pray. It is the time when all about us are bend- ing energies to discovering how to give pleasure to certain others. No doubt many are making the quest for pleasing gifts too much a burden, and perhaps other motives than the promotion of happiness sometimes enter into our observance of the day. Custom makes slaves of us in this as in other things. But who among us is not better for reminding him- self once a year of all the friends that are his, and devoting himself for a season to the happiness of those friends, and particularly to the happiness of little children. For ever since that day of old when the light of a new vision broke through the gloom of fear and hate, suspicion and cunning, oppression and slavery that once darkened the world, the little child has been to humanity more and more the symbol of trust and innocence and freedom, and of all that go to make up the perfect day to which we look forward for this world in the far future, and for ourselves and our loved ones in the world to come. In wishing one another a Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year we are wishing for a finer and a better world. Let us saturate our- selves in that wish and work toward it the year around, charging our bat- teries anew each year with the Christmas spirit and giving free play to that spirit as the years roll on, so that each passing Christmas shall find us, not where the previous one found us, but a full revolution far- ther on toward "the city that hath foundations." Firpo — "I'm not as dumb as I look." Bohaker — "I realize that is an impossibility." Literary Great men have been among us ; hands have penned and tongues have uttered wisdom — tVads*ivorth ON WEARING NEW SHOES By Claire Fisher Show me a normal human being, old or young, brilliant or dull, pop- ular or unpopular, who has not at one time or another felt as though he were walking on his nose. We have all suffered untold agonies and painful self-consciousness just be- cause we were wearing a pair of old shoes. Yet, those shoes may have been beautiful in the days of their youth. But now that they are old and in a weakened condition, we are very much ashamed of them. It is in this frame of mind that we finally decide to pilfer our dime bank and saunter forth in quest of new and a la mode footwear. After buying a pair of shoes which we are sure are the latest fashion and which we think fit our feet and our pocketbook, we wend our way joyfully home with the precious bun- dle under our arm. We take them out and gaze pridefully upon their shining surfaces and even go so far as to say that they are worth the fabulous sum we paid for them. The next day we take out the old $m shoes from their night's resting place under the bed and disdainfully sniff as we notice the run-down beds. Coming to a hasty decision, we throw them into a corner of the closet and take out our new shoes. Oh, deceitful things, if one could but read beneath your shining surface! We don them and start down-town with our heads in the air and our hearts singing merrily within us. But woe unto the poor mortal who tries to subordinate his feet in favor of style, for he is quickly made to suffer. The first symptom is a chok- ing feeling around our walking appendages. This, we excuse by muttering to ourselves that that feel- ing is because they are new. We smile sweetly at Mrs. Jones and stop to inquire after the health of her child who is recovering from measles. Mrs. Jones immediately begins a de- tailed account of the how, when, and where of Johnny's measles, and we summon all our self-control and will- power to our aid in trying to silence the groaning of our feet. We take our leave of Mrs. Jones and board a street car, city-bound. Alas! STATE NORMA-LITE Just as we expected! Not a seat available and we try to console our- selves with the pleasant thought that it is only a half hour's ride to our destination. So we sway backwards and forwards, first standing on our right foot , then on our left. We try to lean heavily on the seat-back near us so that some of our weight will be taken off our feet, and we grumble about the car service, people who joggle one constantly, and of the world in general. Just then the car jolts and our two hundred and fifty- pound neighbor plants his number nine shoe directly on our right foot. Our poor feet scream so that we think that all the passengers in the car can hear them, and we struggle with our facial expression and our voice to answer, "Certainly," to the man's, "Pardon me." However, if we were to say out loud the things we are thinking, all the ladies would promptly leave the car. Meanwhile shooting pains play leap frog inside our shoes, and we nearly faint from shear exhaustion. But being of a bulldog nature we manage to live until we get off the street car and into the office. Then, without any regard for our fellow employees, we madly tear the shoes off our burning feet and throw them just as far as we can. We lean back and let our toes breathe in the fresh air and solemnly invoke the heavens to bear witness to the state- ment that we are never again going to wear new shoes. DEBATING ACTIVITIES By Betty Saltzman The debating season was opened by a three cornered political debate held on a most timely date, Novem- ber 4, Election Day. The Progres- sive Party upheld by Senior P. A. and the Democratic Party represent- ed by J. H. S. IV were defeated in a most evenly matched and hard fought debate, by the Republican Party, championed by Senior I. The Juniors were allowed for the first time this year to show their debating mettle on December 4, when Juniors I and II met to debate the subject, Resolved: That the Phil- lippines should be given immediate independence. Instead of the usual method of rendering the decision by a board of three Judges, novelty was introduced by letting the student body vote on the merits of the de- bate. Junior I proved victorious by a vote of 133 to 69. The schedule for the remaining inter-divisional debates, the dates of which are somewhat tentative, fol- lows: Dec. 11 Senior II versus. Senior II P. A. Dec. 18 Junior III " Junior P. A. Jan. 8 Junior IV " Junior V The selection of the school team by members of the board of judges will be announced shortly after the last debate. Plans are being made for a debate with our last year's rival, Keene, N. H. Normal. Mr. Akeley — "Now, I'll ask the kind of questions they ask in Junior High. Can you answer this one, McNally?" Miss Williams: "What is your favorite masterpiece in English liter- ature?" M. Kempton — "The Sheik." 10 STATE NORMA-LITE DEBATING By Betty Saltzman The importance of an activity is judged by value received. Debat- ing, therefore, is of the utmost im- portance. Debating is the "Open Sesame" to confidence, one of the acknowledged attributes of a suc- cessful person. One of the best ways to gain the ability to stand on both feet and express your opinion on a subject, is by debating. You can- not learn to speak through books. You must gain this ability through practice — and debating gives that necessary practice. Remember, all orators were born — but very few are born orators. Practically every individual has to acquire this ability to speak, and with it, the habit of logic. Debating probably more than any other form of discourse makes you, through thinking along logical and coherent lines, talk along such lines. Fortunately, this school has real- ized to some extent these few facts relative to the importance of debat- ing. The Council composed of one representative from each division, has been duly pleased with the in- terest shown in this activity. That greater majority of students who are unable to take active part in that most beneficial of activities, debating, can and should lend their moral support by attending the de- bates. Just as a foot-ball team depends on its loyal supporters, so debating in this school will depend on your enthusiasm, support, and poise, logic and independent thought. willingness to co-operate. Make it perfectly evident that you realize the importance of debating as an activ- ity, the values of which, so manifold, include the gaining of confidence. ATHENS THE MOTHER CITY OF THE WORLD By Vera Goodrich The lesson taught us by this famous city old, Is to regard past men and their deeds sublime Their ruined shrines in our hearts we should not hold As dead and useless limbs upon the tree of time. The past has made the present, even now today, The present molds the future of each great nation ; There is no portion of our earth we can truly say That can compare with her for inspi- ration. One lofty sentiment begets another one, One valid deed inspires a second to its rights, While one sublime achievement known to be well done, Shall be a stepping stone to far more lofty heights. Now in this ancient city, not so far away, Were born the masterpieces of the human mind, And Athens claims the memories that are today Unique and uncompared by any modern kind. Toupence — (running into room breathlessly) "Have you any List- erine?" Yarter — "What do you want it for?" F. T. — "I just found the cutest little black and white animal outside, but I'm afraid he has halitosis." STATE NORMA-LITE 11 PROPAGANDA By Alice V. Cashman In the first place, propaganda is that obnoxious influence that makes us believe that black is white even though we don't want to at all. It has the most widespread power in the world today with the possible exception of the Ford. Of course, you all know that propaganda won the war; and per- haps you have heard, also, that since then, it has succeeded in putting Bingville on the map, a feat which many consider to be its major attainment. Likewise, it was propa- ganda that instilled so great an ap- preciation of the aesthetic in Jack Dempsey that he delivered a smash- ing uppercut to the theory that "the old order never changeth" by altering the architecture of his nose. But propaganda has done even more than this; it has made us realize its poten- tialities to such an enormous degree that we are now hoping to enlist its services in our effort to persuade barbers to go to Russia, the land of tonsorial opportunity. Propaganda has induced little girls who aspire to naturally curly hair to eat bread crusts; it has done more for prohibition than did Carrie Nation, and it has furnished main- tenance to the Animal Rescue League ever since the society was founded. Because propaganda has done so much, and because it is capable of doing so much more, we are hoping to see one day some material tribute to it as the mainstay of progress and prosperity. The name inscribed thereon, like baking powder some- times in a cake, may exist only in fancy, but we will see it each time we look upon the proposed mon- ument to its success which may be, — who knows ? — only a much needed curtain for our assembly hall. ALMA MATER By Thomas Bowler Old school on the hill you'll always be, A beacon on life's shore to me. By your strong, and trusting light, I'll try my best to do the right. Out upon life's treacherous sea, You'll cast your rays and rescue me. You've molded my mind and character too, To you, Alma Mater, I'll always be true. I'll ne'er forget where'er I roam Across the seas, or far from home. Your sacred light will ever shine On my achievments, till I cross the line. When upon life's shore I stand Your rays will guide me, to the promised land They'll then grow dim, and fade away Only to return some joyful day. ODE TO GRECIAN CIVILIZATION By Gertrude I. McConville If you learned Socrates but lived To give your stately dignity its due — Or Pericles to raise on yon steep hill A monument, against a sky-line blue — Then would your worth be praised and known, Shouted from wintry crag to glist'ning sea. — My frail words are like a shuttered room, A puff of smoke against a giant tree 1 The first link in civilization's chain, Thou art the very Key to Life ; — Sublime, serene, art built to stand The ecstasies of joy, the buffetings of strife. 12 STATE NORMA-LITE THE SEE— SAW OF LIFE By Bernadette Mahoney Life is a see-saw of ups and downs. We always hold one end, but the occupant of the other is changeable. Some longed-for dream material- izes. Some difficult task is success- fully accomplished. Something very advantageous and pleasurable with the added thrill of unexpectedness happens, and we are tilted high up into the clouds to inhabit our air castles. We live for the time being in a house of dreams. Then it is that we know Good Fortune, Oppor- tunity, or Luck is seated on the other end, holding us high with all his weight and force. But, when our playfellow yields his place to Mis- fortune, 111 luck or Calamity, down we come with a crash, not being able to outweigh or even balance with him. Where once we dwelt serenely and securely in the heights, we now plod on in the depths. Thus, it is ever in life, up and down, down and up. But is it not life's uncertainty that makes it worth living ? Isn't the fun of a see-saw in its ups and downs ? Then since life is a see-saw, what would it be without ups and downs ? I have been told a little secret about this see-saw of life, and that is, that there is no need of worry, no need of grumbling, if Love has the middle when we have the ends. McCann — "What are you think- ing about, Jack?" Jack — "Oh, something serious." McCann — "Is it a Normal School girl?" Jack — "I said something serious." WHERE BODIES GO By A Nownbe Muss "And are you dead?" old Charon bawled, "I am, kind sir; that's why I called, I'm looking for a room and board, Come! Let me in! Untie that chord!"' Old Charon pulled his craft "on : My soul hopped in and Charon cried, "The craft's too heavy with thy shell, Thou'lt need it not, methinks, in Hell. Cast it overboard, I say; You'll swamp us both if you delay!" My soul it threw me in the Styx — I sank a mile and then sank six To where the slimy fishes play Leagues beneath the light of day. A thousand other husks like mine Lay pickling in the reeking brine. Great Jove! I had not looked for t 1 And Jove, in that kind way of his, Lets me sleep away the time In the writhing, reeking brine. Each aeon I awake and see The fishes eating holes in me. I'm pickling in the river Styx, Below the surface, a mile and six. TWO LITTLE LEAVES By Grace M. Carr Two little leaves of autum, Were whirling in the sun, Laughing and dancing together For their summer work was done. The ice winds blew, and the cold hail too, But what see we under the cover? Two little leaves from off the trees, Snuggled close to each other. J. Kiley — "Say, do you know. our waitress insulted me!" Phelps — "How so?" Kiley — "Well. I was eating din- ner, and she handed me a napkin. Believe me, I told her I knew when to use a handkerchief, without being insulted." STATE NORIMA-LITE 13 LOVE By Vera Goodrich The world was full of things I loathed. Everywhere was error beckoning his brawny finger to me. I shuddered. A clammy chill danc- ed the minuet ten times over,, beside the walls of my spinal column — all to the tune of the discordant harp strings of my once calm nerves. Nothing was harmonious with my spirit. Why should I, alone, out of millions of others be so maliciously annoyed? Then — ah blessed moment — what a happy thought came into my tired mind. Why stand all this mis- ery and grow old while yet so young? End it all for once and forever! Without a second's hesitation I seized the dagger of relief and pierced my aching heart to the core. How my very soul did bleed! But ah. 'twas comfort beside the heathen misery I had been enduring. When the last drop of bitter aversion had trickled its wicked way to its de- struction I took a long, refreshing drink from the cup of Life held out to me by no other than Lady Fancy herself. I was changed in an instant! As I looked about me I saw a vast mead- ow, beautifully dotted with exquisite flowers painted in every hue with Nature's selection of harmonious colors. But. as I gazed again I saw that the meadow was bounded on the north by hate, on the east by lust, on the south by fear, on the west by the foamy rapids of the river of ever flowing trouble and the island of misery. How beautiful was this handiwork of God to be surrounded by such erroneous things. I would that I could build a huge wall, lined with pure gold, and in- dole this charming spot in the valley before the germs from its wicked enviroment should eat their way into the peaceful enclosure. My inner-self began to challenge me, "Why stand idle and wish so easy a thing? Take hold of the plow of opportunity and make the furrow for your heart's desire.'' Hesitatingly I obeyed, for in my changed condition I dared not err in the sight of my inner conscious- ness. Twenty long years passed ere the last brick was laid in the wall of salvation. I, alone, had made it, each tiny brick, each row upon the other, each turn and even the one and only golden gate at the entrance which I bad taken especial care to put on the east side of the beautiful meadow so that the first rays of the early morning sun would shine through the golden rods and send warmth and sunshine into the little valley. But were those years spent in misery? Ah no, never had I been so happy. Every moment added more joy to my life, more inspiration to my thoughts, and more kindness to my heart. I looked at my work and "saw that it was good," so I sat down to rest. But my inner-self again whispered to me, "Don't waste your precious moments. Your work is 14 STATE NORMA-LITE hardly yet begun. Turn you now to the meadow, see the flowers beck- oning to you? Why sit you here in idleness when duty bids you come?" I arose. A new song was in my heart and lo! ere another year had passed, a highway of sparkling gems had been laid through the very center of my property. No street, even in Paradise could ever be so beautiful. I looked at it again and "saw that it was good." From kindly deeds, happy thoughts and cheerful smiles I shaped more bricks, for now I was going to build a city. A city in my little valley, safely excluded from all the sins of the wicked, weary world, by a thick high wall. A city where only love could dwell. Not one germ of wickedness could take root and grow within the golden wall. Diligently I worked for many more years. As I now recollect, first I constructed a church — neither of creed nor scripture — but a church of love, the dome of which rose far above the highest mountain ever molded. I made it thus so that the spectrum cast by its dazzling stones would attract weary souls like mine from the evil world. It was a beau- tiful structure and angelic were the lessons learned within its walls. By far it was the most important part of the whole city. Then there were factories, not smoky, dingy buildings, but beau- tiful ones with flowers in their win- dows and everywhere were rays of sunshine. No pay did the workers get except for the common good of the city, for what was the need of temptation within so pure a place? Every kind of clothing was made in our factories and all of our food was raised on our side of the golden wall. By providing all of our ne- cessities ourselves we could weave love in every article and have noth- ing from any foul source. Our schools were of the highest type. The personality of any of our teachers alone was enough to make us grown-ups almost wish we were children so that we might go to school. Never was a cross word spoken to any child and I'm sure that never did any pupil say ill things about their instructors. Our homes — ah wonderful places of charm. Each building was of pure gold both on the inside and out, and golden were the minutes which were spent in making them more beautiful. Amusement? Why, we were so happy within ourselves that we need- ed no outside stimulant for joy. Laws? There were no hard and fast rules laid down by our city officials, and none did we need for our law was greater. Along every path and street in our city one could find rose bushes beautifully adorning every fence and wall. They were a new kind of rose with gorgeous, fragrant blossoms, and strange to say, though it is true, not a thorn could be found on any stem. Every day we went to the golden gate to welcome any strangers who might wish admittance, but only a STATE NORMA-LITE 15 pure heart could pass through that wonderful gate and into eternal hap- piness. Many were turned sadly away. Some would come again at a later date and then be admitted. Others were never seen nor heard from again. We were so happy with- in our little city of purity and hope that when we asked for an appro- priate name for it, with one accord, ten thousand voices breathed "LOVE." TEARS By Gerd Aage Gillhoff "Tears, idle tears, I know not what they mean, Tears from the depth of some divine despair Rise to the heart and gather to the eyes, In looking on the happy Autumn fields, And thinking of the days that are no more" So Tennyson sighs lachrymosely in "The Princess." The bosom of the diseuse heaves emotionally, the women hasten infinitesimal hand- kerchiefs across their tear-stained faces, and fat men shake their pen- dulous stomachs. A touching man- ifestation of "Weltschmerz," though Stephen Crane, if present at the delivering of the recitation, would undoubtedly exclaim, "Swill!" and H. L. Mencken, Tishposh! Bum- combe!" Tears are indeed invaluable to the poet, the dramatist, and the novelist. The prodigal son must inevitably burst into tears after a long list of vagaries, when he realizes his mis- takes, and takes the straight and narrow path to salvation. The am- bitious young man weeps when the vanity of all human wishes is re- vealed to him. The heroine cries and cries when her lover turns false, and spends the rest of her life with an old maiden aunt, watering a ger- anium pot, knitting, and supervising a few hens. With what have tears not been compared! They are the dewdrops, pearls, diamonds. I should be more observant and thus more original in my comparisons: one might call them amethysts, carbunc- les, onyxes, topazes, rubies, agates, turquoses, amber glass, resin,inspis- sated turpentine, perfume from Wool- worth's castor oil. Authors have an almost unexplored field here. Do you remember Heine's poem in which he says that he kneeled before his beloved, and drank from her hands, the tears falling from her eyes. My version of the third stan- za is: ^'1 saw them fall upon your hands, And I fell upon me knees: Since then I've been inflicted with What's called the hibes-jibes." We all know Chopin's "Prelude in D flat." There is an interesting story told in connection with it, for the authenticity of which I cannot vouch. While at Majorca, Chopin was alone when a terrific thunder- storm broke out. Being hyper- sensitive, he had this strange dream. A sea nymph sat near him, playing a beautiful melody on the flute, while he was lying at the bottom of a deep ocean, and drops fell on his breast at regular intervals. These became heavier, and heavier, louder, and louder, until he no longer heard 16 STATE NORMA-LITE the music. The piece comes to a crashing climax when Chopin real- izes that the drops are the tears of his deceased friends, weeping for him. Dr. Andress would probably say Chopin was on the road to insanity. And he was. Some composer ought to write a symphony of tears. Why didn't Tschaikowsky do it? I nominate Mr. Rachmaninoff for this "job", having heard his musical poem after Bocklin's picture — "The Island of the Dead." With this, and his pro- gram music to Poe's lugubrious 'The Bells," such a bawl compo- ould form a most effective trio. is reminds me of an i at a concert, during which I sat near an old lady, listening to an obese oprano who tried very hard to sing. When she came to a group of modern Russians, and started to moan/'Oh, cease thy singing, maiden fair!'' i spinster — I'm sure she was one — robbed audibly. Finall OL'e to leave, whisp* T can't stand it any longer!" I quite agreed with her. Oh. great is the diversity of te We have tears of affection, most use- ful for one's standing, pocket-book, rid countless reasons, ou ever hear of a p candidate who o over helmed ven him in his hoE • . ' rept — crocodile tears? There are tears of pity which fiction. • 03 e of the pan learns that pity is no- >nomou • : svm- ent and of sentimen- tality, of impotent anger, o f love and of fear, of suicidal reflections, and — most wonderful of all kinds — tears of laughter. I always get out of the way of tears when I possibly can. While people were weeping over "Over the Hill" and "Where is My W T andering Boy Tonight?" I was rude enough to giggle and even laugh loudly when I saw these pictures; but then I'm not human. I actually did feel water in my eyes when I saw "Beau Brum- mel," but it never developed into tears. Once when I was very young, I slapped a girl on the back. Im- mediately she burst into crying, and threatened to tell her ma what I had done; but, instead of doing so, she just continued howling. Now I why. Since then I have spent many hours on this subtle question: - I innocent then, or merely dumb? Several years ago, after a heated 'anient, I called another girl (young lady, I suppose! ) a dish ra,^. She, too, resorted to tears, and prob- ably expected me to atone for mv crime. How? Hm, mm, mm! But I didn't, and she hasn't spoken to me . c ince. Not that I mind. H a v e I not rhapsodized lonu r ►ugh on this stimulating subject? I hear a universal "Yes!" Much more could be said, but, as you h? p-obably seen by now, this is not a ertation, not a scientific treatise. Yet I hope it has stirred in you mcient interest to do reference work: make it your project, and use all humanity for bibliographv. Study the iniquity, the beauty, the tguor of tears! But be careful you don't emerge a sob-sister or a g brother. &<®S^S3!?' -t\CL © D ^v3 ■VV?, WS^SP'^^^S^'^B^ HALLOWEEN PASTY By Katherlne Boyle On the night of the tnirty-hrst of October at seven o'clock, the annual Halloween Party, given by the mem- bers of the J. H. S. IV class was held at the Normal Sc- ool The good time began by the walk through the darkened subway. After everyone had gone through the mysterious subwaj*, an entertain- ment was held in the Practical Arts A^semblv Hall. This consisted o: a ghost story, ghost dances, and songs. We then went to the Normal Hall Library, which was pleasingly decorated in orange and black ana other Sj'inbols of the Halloween season. Here a grand march was held and dances and stunts also took place, which caused great merriment. At ten o'clock, the students all lined up and marched downstairs to the lobby where refreshments con- sisting of doughnuts and sweet cider were served. While they were lined up waiting to be served the songs, "Go Get a Pail" and "The Bear Went Over the Mountain" could be heard all over the buik.i. After refreshments, they again went to the library where more dancing and stunts were held until eleven o'clock. We had among the group a number of guests of the alumni, who came back to get acquainted. All who attended the party very much en- joyed it, and give thanks to the members of the J. H. S. IV class. MASQUERADE PARTY By Mary Carmody It was a very dark night, in the latter part of November. There was mystery in the air. Everyone was tense with excitement, for there was to be a Masquerade Party. At eight o'clock the young people thronged into the lobby and in groups they came into the Ball Room. W T hat a beautiful picture they made! There were Pilgrims, and Puritans, Fairies, Dancers, Farmerettes, Farm- ers, Spark Plugs, and Old Fashioned Boys and Girls, all masked. The music commenced and the boys and girls danced several num- bers. The revelers were asked to form in line for the grand march. Soon they started to march and the sight was one of beauty and not a 18 STATE NORMA-LITE little amusement. After the grand march, prizes were awarded for the best and funniest costumes. Danc- ing was resumed for a while and then refreshments were served. After this the young people resumed their dancing. DORM GIRLS' PARTY Palmer Hall presented a true hol- iday aspect on the night of Decem- ber fifteenth. In one corner of the reception room stood the tree, with its own natural beauty, further en- hanced by drapings of silver and glistening globes, roseate from the secluded light in the background. When study hour was over and the clock said eight, a jostling crowd of boys and girls, hurried into the reception room to wait for Santa. Occasional whiffs from pine bran- ches suggested the festiveness of the party. Laughter and kid talk bub- bled on every side. Then there was a quell in the sea of merriment. Little Helen Collins was going to sing, and Essie Boyle was to play for her. Her child voice trembled on E flat, but she held it bravely and when she finished, the applause seemed interminable. The next soloist was Mary Car- mody who sang about 'Thantie Clauthe." Again there was a loud applause, as blushing Mary took her seat. May Elass and "Bobbie" Dillon reminisced about school days, in a most graceful fashion. Then a screen in one corner of the room was drawn back, showing Santa's workshop, how busy his helpers were on Xmas Eve! What humor vollied from one to another as they hammered away! Then the good old Saint came in, and with the help of his kind wife, filled his pack and started for F. N.S. In almost no time he was here, surrounded by his children. He dis- tributed gifts to all. On each present was a little jingle, which the receiver read aloud. Refreshments were brought in, and every kiddie sulked when she was told that the party ended at ten and she must hustle off to bed. PARTY OF THE WOMEN'S ATHLETIC ASSOCIATION By Mildred Marble The Women's Athletic Association, a new name for the organization known as the Girls' Athletic, held its first party this year on November twenty, at three thirty o'clock. All members were of course invited, and many attended wearing their gym costume. The first part of the evening was spent in the gymnas- ium. Here the players of different sports gave their yell and entertained the onlookers with a stunt representing their accomplishments. For example, in a certain sport the highly success- ful hockey game played with brooms for hockey sticks and a basket ball for the hockey puck. At the close of the stunt perform- ances, prizes were awarded to the teams which in all respects most de- served them. At five twenty-five o'clock, the girls were dismissed to dress for din- ner which lasted until six, when the party ended. The aim of this party, beside being a successful climax to the fall sport season, was to bring the Junior and Senior girls together and to give them a chance to become better acquainted. n IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII.HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII.IIIIIIII ITIWITl n q q Binn q d q q cnno d n CEZinnsniEEHi ci cj .liJIIIilllllillll'IT.MIB B D A strong body is one of man's greatest assets ID □ c EE inn ^ — 'innnnnnnnnor Trmnn iTTTmffimiiiiiiiiiii.iiiiiiiiiiiim an BASKETBALL jgy John McNally The basketball season is upon us. The first call for candidates for the Normal team brought out twenty- five young men. Of these Captain Scott, Leland, Roche, and Hilbert are letter men from last year's team. The prospects for a successful season took on a most rosy aspect, when it was learned Coach Clarence Aminott of the Fitchburg High School, recog- nized as one of the best coaches of basketball in New England, had been secured to coach the Normal team. Of the newcomers, McDonnell and Phelps of North Adams, Kruszyna of Adams, Dyer of Clinton, Riordan of Worcester, and Fitzgerald, former star of the Worcester Trade, looked most promising. The schedule as arranged by Manager John McNally is an exceedingly hard one. It is hoped, however, considering the ma- terial on hand and the excellent coach, that Normal will have one of the best teams in the history of the school. The schedule is as follows: Dec. 13, 1924 Normal vs. Northeastern at Boston. Dec. 18, 1924 University of Vermont vs. Normal at Burlington. Jan. 3, 1925 Boston College vs. Normal at home. Jan. 10, 1925 Lowell Textile vs. Normal at Lowell. Jan. 17 1925 Alumni vs. Normal at home. Jan. 24 1925 Open Jan. 31, 1925 Cushing Academy at Cushing. Feb. 7, 1925 St. John's Prep vs. Normal at Danvers. Feb. 14, 1925 Dean vs. Normal at Franklin. Feb. 21, 1925 Andover vs. Normal at Andover. March 10, 1925 Keene Normal vs. Normal at Keene. Bridgewater Normal vs. Normal at home (Pending) Gentsch — "How is everything in Lunenburg?" Stone — "About the same as I left it, I guess." 20 STATE NORMA-LITE WOMEN'S ATHLETIC ASSOCIATION By Kitty Wilcox The following officers of the Women's Athletic Association were elected at a meeting held on Sept- ember 29, 1924: Mary Marsh President Mary Lewis Vice President Grace Brown Secretary Alice Woods Treasurer Kitty W'ilcox Tennis Leader Rosamond O'Neil Hike Leader Jessie Wood Cheer Leader On October 14, 1924, a new point system for the organization was ex- plained by the president. After some discussion it was unanimously voted to accept this system and to adopt the name "Women's Athletic Association", instead of U G i rl s ' Athletic Association." At this same meeting Mr. Clancy spoke of the proposed new athletic field and of the football game be- tween St. Anselm's and Fitchburg Normal School, which was a benefit game to raise funds for the field. He suggested that the Women's Ath- letic Association donate one-half the price of a ticket for each girl and each girl be assessed the other half. This proposition was voted on and accepted unanimously. The question of raising the dues to $2.00 a year, thus entitling each girl to a season !;et from the Men's Athletic Asf >- ciation was discussed and was finally voted on 2nd accepted. The Women's Athletic Association plans to do a great deal this year, and with the co-operation of all the girls will have achieved no doubt as great success as has attended the activities of the organization in for- mer years. TENNIS By Kitty Wilcox The tennis season opened this fall with a great deal of enthusiasm displayed both by the men and women students of the Normal School. Every day there could be seen on the courts ambitious players aspiring to become "champs" like Tilden or Wills. A large number of girls chose tennis as their major fall sport, and those who were not familiar with the game attempted to learn it. On account of the great demand for the courts a tennis book was hung in the lobby, wherein all those desiring to play could sign and make their reservations for courts. A tournament for men and v/omen is being planned for spring, and it is expected that a great deal of en- thusiasm and interest will be man- ifested in this event. TWINKLING STAR By Anonymous Twinkling Star ! As rose-hued dewdrops never mar But beautify the way Your gleams in azure sky now are O Twinkling Star. O Twinkling Star ! A glory at the end of day, While the minstrel low to his guitar Sings sweetest song 'neath your bright ray, O Twinkling Star. FRIENDS, FACULTY, STUDENTS Don't ever try: To be a salesman like Jimmie Smith, To be as pompous as "Sully," To have a wave like Scottie's, To be as funny as Muggsie, To be an orator like Davenport, To be as witty as Joe Reardon, To be an athlete like Rocky, To be as good looking as the Sheik, To be an actor like Fitzy, To play tennis like "Prof." Conry, To be as quiet as Margaret De Roche, To be as pretty as Marion Suttcliffe, To be a monologuist like Betty Saltzman, To debate like Gert McConville, To dress like Irene Shea, To dance like "Zo" Masiedo, To be as jolly as Iky Lezotte, To "teach" like Gert Handlin, To be as sweet as Helen Devaney, To blush like Rachel Murray. To be as constant as Eleanor Pratt, To be as easy-going as Mary Lewis, To sing like Mr. Clancy, To be as lovely as Mrs. Still, To have a geographical collection like Miss Webster's, To be as humorous as Mr. Har- rington, To write as many books as Mr. Kirkpatrick, To draw like Miss Lamprey, To remember as many facts as Mr. Smith, TO FIND A BETTER SCHOOL THAN F.N. S. It can't be done. IMPRESSIONS WE JUNIORS RECEIVED OUR FIRST WEEK AT F. N. S. Things we Juniors will never forget. The tunnels, The drinking (?) water. The free instead of study period. The principal's kindness in telling us we were our own masters here A mail box for each of us. The correct (?) time-keeping clocks in every room, 22 STATE NORMA-LITE That complicated program on the on the bulletin board, Our questions about the classes and teachers, The dividing of our class and sep- aration of pals, The dorm girls and commuters. Which was which ? The scarcity of men, Our first glimpse of the shiek, The lounging chair in the lobby, That professional feeling, Scottie's wave and knickers, Davenport's height, Marion Suttcliffe's head bands, Mary Foster's hair, JJC JJC 5JC 5JC McDonnell — "Say, Major, if you were rich, what would you want most of all?" Major — "An alarm clock with a busted buzzer." * * * * Mr. Harrington: "Name an Era of Good feeling in America." V. F. R. — "The Whiskey Re- bellion." ^c H« 5ft * J. O. — "He said he was dying to see you." M. M.— "Wouldn't that be a fun- ny way to die?" 1st student — "What is your idea of a plausible excuse?" 2d student — "One that makes Mr. Morrill have sympathy for you." * * * * Huck — "How was the party?'' Tim — "Terrible. Everyone was at school the next day." FAMOUS SAYINGS BY FAMOUS MEN Major — Take your time fellows, take your time! Huck — Oh, gee, Lets play checkers! Sheik — "I love that little girl." Fitzy — One, six, two, fish and glue. Cap — I'm the only bachelor. Stebbins — And that ain't maybe. Rabouin — Gee, it's tough to be small. Dolan — I'm Irish and I'm proud of it. Toupence — No, I'm too much of a gentleman. Leland — I've done that, too. Pinney — The seniors are a bluff. Healey — Well, my brother Hen- ry, etc. Riordan — Alia Bulla, Balla Bulla. Sullivan — Give me a cigarette. Bowler — The barbers are on a strike. Devlin — Look-out, or I'll knock you down to my size. Sheehan — Playing "Postoffice." Mr. Smith — Is there anybody absent? G. Talcot — I'll help you. * * * * Henry Becklund — (at box office) "Two tickets, please." Ticket seller. — "What date?" Henry— (absently) "Mary." * * * * Joe Rabouin — "Scottie," have you tried out the newest steps?" Scottie — "No, are they any softer than the fire escape?" * * * * Cap Akeley — Well, let's cum t' attention here! STATE NORMA-LITE 23 Bowler went to a dance last week. He was dancing with a nice young girl. After they had been dancing for a while, she said. "I am getting dizzy from dancing." Tom said, "You had better come out on the veranda and sit down with me for a while." The girl said, "Oh, I am not quite as dizzy as that yet. * * * * Jim Keilty — "Stan," why is a notebook like a girl?" Stan — "I don't know; why?" J. K. — "Because everyone should have one of his own and not be borrowing the other fellows'." Mr. Randall says he is pleased to hear that Scott, Leland, and Rabouin used many Sunday afternoons this fall studying flowers. * * * * Miss Sutcliffe, Miss Brewster, Miss Butler, Miss Hutchings, Miss Blaisdell, Miss Goodrich, and Miss Saltzman make one think of a crowd of Normal School boys at a burlesque show." Miss Stockwell — "How's that?" Miss Sutcliffe — "You always find them in the front seats ! " * * * * SOCIETY NOTE We would like to announce that Miss Helen Cooke, who is a pupil of this school, recently won a quick speaking contest conducted by the English Department of the State and the Remington Rapid Machine Gun Works. Congratulations, Miss Cooke! EXTRA ATTRACTION BIG CONTEST We would like to announce that "Jerry" Gingras, Jake Smith, Jack Healey, and Wink Hurlburt will com- pete in a bow-legged contest. The winner will be given the privilege of attempting to capture a greased pig in the gymnasium on the after- noon of the Faculty — Grammar Master Basketball game. Since all desire efficient judges, they have de- cided that the judges shall be as follows: Accuracy of angles — Mr. McLean Balance — Miss Conlon Beauty — Miss Lamprey Flexibility — Miss McDermott This is positively free of charge. 4C ' SfC 3^ 3fS Mrs. Hilbert — "Dear Editor: My husband is out every night, and I am very lonely. Would you suggest something for me to do?" Editor — "Send us your address." * * * * Ginger — "What did Joe Burke do when Janet wouldn't kiss him out on the lake last night?" Hazel — "Paddled her back." Ginger — "Oh, the rough thing!" Sheik — "Heavens, man, but that suit is too big for you!" Quirk — "That's all right, I come from Bondsville." Sheik — "What do you mean?" Quirk — "I'm a bigger man there than I am here." 24 STATE NORMA-LITE Sheehan — "Friedman, the way you swing that hammer reminds me of lightning." Friedman — " Why?" Sheehan — "Because you never strike twice in the same place." * * * * That charming little book written by Mr. Leon Yarter on, "How to make love," or Personal Reminis- cences of an Expert" is reported to be having a very large sale. * * * * Shingle on Gay Strepek's Door: "I will guarantee to make you look like what you don't, but would like to, for fifty cents. * * * * Mr. Harrington, (In a sympathetic tone) — "I can't imagine anything more dreadful than a man without a country." Mae Blass — "Oh! I can. Im- agine a country without a man.." * * * * The gum chewing girl and the cud chewing cow, There is a difference we will allow. What is the difference — ? Oh, I have it now, It's the thoughtful look on the face of the cow. * * * * Mr. Harrington — "Why, in the colonial days, they were so modest they even put skirts over the legs of the chair. Isn't that so, Mr. Parkinson?" Mr. Parkinson — "Well, I don't know about that, but I've seen them in other places." Miss Williams — "Is there anyone here whose name wasn't called and who is absent? If so, will he please raise his hand?" And half the class looked about to see how many would raise their hands. P. S. I wasn't there. ODE Any girl can be gay in a classy coupe, In a taxi, they all can be jolly, But the girl worth while, is the girl who can smile, When you're taking her home in the trolley. (College Humor) Miss Conlon — "Did you finish that tray yourself, Mr. Cavanaugh?" Major — "No." Miss Conlon — "Who did it?" Major — "Santa Claus." * * * * Ten years from now — Bowler (J. H. S. A. C.) to football squad. "How many of you have ever heard of Henry Healey?" Squad — (Perfectly silent) Bowler — "What! You have never heard of Henry Healey? Why his brother Jack, etc." * * * * The A. A. Meeting was getting ex- cited. Mr. Dolan — "I maintain that Stebbins is out of order." Stebbins — "How am I out of or- der? Dolan — "Consult a veterinary. Perhaps he can tell you."